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The start of a new year is a blank slate, a perfect opportunity for reflection and a time to establish goals for the next 12 months. Most of us make – and often break – resolutions at the start of a year, primarily to get healthier through better eating, smoking cessation and a more regular exercise routine. What if, instead of focusing solely on our own well-being, we put the same thoughts and energy into nurturing our relationships? Specifically our romantic relationship with our partner? Setting goals for a happier, healthier union could benefit both of you and a year of keeping resolutions to make your relationship stronger could have a lasting impact.
Take Care of Yourself … And Your Partner
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We aren’t suggesting that you put health initiatives on the back burner. Quite the contrary, actually. Approaching a wellness plan as a couple can keep you both motivated and on task, whether you monitor progress on a shared app or a handwritten chart. Set convenient times to go to the gym together, research and develop meal plans that address your collective and individual goals, and make lifestyle changes that can contribute to a longer, healthier life. Gauge how you’re doing on a regular basis, and provide positive, uplifting feedback and encouragement.
Take the same approach to your spiritual health, too. If you’re a churchgoer but have been lacking in attendance as of late, make a commitment together to return to services more regularly. If meditation and mindfulness are more interesting, research positive affirmations and mantras that will benefit your spirit and soul.
Schedule Family Time
No matter how old your kids are, they need attention from you and your partner. Quality family time is essential, so make memories that will never fade by spending time together as a family. Schedule it and be 100 percent present. Ask questions about their day, find out what’s concerning them, and talk through any conflicts. Play games, work together on homework, spend time enjoying their hobbies and introduce them to others. Encourage the kids to make their own resolutions, and plan age-appropriate activities throughout the year to keep them on track.
Schedule Date Nights, Too
At the same time, it’s also important to devote alone time with your partner, so you can communicate openly and honestly. This should be a time to review your individual and mutual goals, decide if you need to re-calibrate and generate new ideas to strengthen your bond.
Determine a Budget
Groan. The mere word “budget” makes many people shudder. It sounds so limiting and it can be a difficult thing to agree upon. And yet, one of the things couples fight most about is money – the lack thereof, how it’s spent, what to do with any excess and how much is truly needed. Start the New Year off by sitting down with your partner to review your financial portfolio, and then set goals. Do you need to plan for college tuition? Saving for a dream vacation? Your financial goals are possible, but you need to set them and stick to them. Go over ideas with your partner about where you can realistically cut band and prioritize spending. Making a financial resolution together will help you both stick to a money plan.
Spend Time in the Bedroom
When couples find themselves drifting apart, one or both of them will likely cite lack of intimacy as a symptom. Sex brings us closer together, but truthfully, in different stages of life, it can be difficult to find the time and energy. Still, it’s important to remember that very personal bond between you and your partner, and find time for intimacy. If spontaneity is difficult with your schedule, plan for couple’s time throughout the year, perhaps at a nearby hotel for a quick getaway, or hire a sitter for a long afternoon.
Starting a brand new year aligned with your partner will help ensure that you’re both on the same page with respect to the biggest issues couples face, and help you both keep focused throughout the year on your agreed-upon